A few months ago, I met with two fearful and anxious little dogs. Both were male poodle mixes, one rescued from out of state and one picked up as a stray here in the Bay Area. Both dogs were adopted by older couples and both dogs were tightly bonded to the female owners, but fearful of the male owners. For one dog, having the male owner begin preparing and feeding all meals, take for walks and adventures one-on-one, and lots of high value treats for being in proximity to him without barking, created a situation where the dog still preferred the female owner, but was warming up to the male owner. When they did their final follow up appointment last week, this little dog was actually quite fond of the male owner, seeking him out for playtime and even games of chase. Both of the dog's owners were so pleased that this little dog was able to learn that his needs could be met by both of the humans and that both humans could be trusted to provide for him. He is no longer fearful.
Now, on to the other little poodle mix. For this dog, no amount of treats, walks, mealtimes, etc. was changing the way he felt about the male owner. He continued to bark anytime the man walked into or out of the room, up and down the stairs, or even spoke out loud. Not only was the dog still fearful, but the fear seemed to be getting worse, not better. The more this man cared for this dog, the more edgy the dog became. Unless the female owner was home, this dog hid until she returned, only eating and relieving himself in her presence. This was obviously upsetting for both owners, but none more so than the male owner who absolutely loves dogs and has never had a dog not like him! Obviously, what had worked for the other little poodle mix in the previous paragraph wasn't going to work for this dog. Time to think outside of the box. Can you guess what I suggested?
I had this second couple foster another little dog. I had them do a foster as I wanted to make sure that this second little dog would get along with the first one, and their cat, and most importantly, that this second dog would bond more strongly with the male owner than with mom. We found the perfect little foster dog who got along with everybody and she really adores the male owner. She sits on his lap, loves going everywhere with him, and takes treats very joyfully. They worked with the rescue group to formally adopt this sweet little girl and make her their own. Once the pressure was off of the first dog, a funny thing happened. He was less anxious overall; the male owner was devoting his time and attention to the other dog, allowing the first dog to just exist. Then the first dog started watching the behavior of the new dog and started acting similarly, meaning when the new dog got excited when she saw dad, the first dog started trotting toward him too, not as joyfully, but in a sort of curious way. The male owner continued to ignore him and focus on the new dog. One of the primary ways dogs learn is through observational learning of each other. This is why it is important to make sure your dogs are learning good things from each other, and not behaviors you'd just as soon they'd extinguish. It now appears that the addition of this second dog is serving as sort of a therapy dog for the first one; her presence is calming and her enthusiasm for the male owner is helping to make living together a lot more feasible. Now, the male owner can enter and exit the room, go up and down stairs, etc. and the original dog doesn't bark at him. He walks the two dogs together and even feeds them together. The big difference is that he now has a dog of his own who thinks the sun rises and sets on him; this means that first dog can just attach himself to mom as there is another dog picking up the slack, so to speak. Harmony accomplished, no drugs needed, no re-homing, and no hurt feelings.
Fear is always a complicated problem to treat. There are many reasons a dog may be fearful, everything from being genetically predisposed, to being under-socialized or poorly socialized, or simply having an introverted personality. Because fear is functional, serving to protect the animal from situations or people that increase their anxiety, it is hard to get rid of quickly. Each of these dogs took a few months to overcome their fear, but both are thriving now. Mission accomplished, files closed.
As always, if you have questions about your pet's behavior, you know where to find me.
Fearful poodles aren't uncommon. Finding the right solution to relieve the fear often
takes some creativity and patience, but it's worth it.
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